I have a stuck client and he cannot move forward because of his obligation to his girlfriend. Phillip became our client pro bono (not his real name) As a favor to a previous client. Phillip is a sharp young man with a lot of ideas, goals, and dreams. The only problem Phillip has is his albatross of a girlfriend. Phillips’s girlfriend Laura (not her real name) does not work, did not finish high school, incessantly smokes cigarettes, and does drugs. She entirely depends on Phillip and his financial well-being. Phillip feels some obligation because he loves her, but she thoroughly weighs him down. Phillip wants to go to school to learn computer-aided drafting, and she does not want that because it would mean he would be away from her. She does not want him to visit his family because that would mean he would be away from her. Phillip and his girlfriend live just outside Oklahoma City. One of his relatives got him a job opportunity paying $50,000 more than he’s making now, but the job training would require him to be in Virginia Beach for about three months without Laura. After thinking about it and talking to Laura about it, she convinced him that it would be a bad idea because he would be away.
I am not cruel or rude here but being completely and utterly honest that this relationship is entirely toxic, and it is killing his opportunities in life. We are not relationship counselors or coaches, but we are successful Goal coaches. Honestly, Laura is a stage 4 cancer to Phillip’s success, and the only remedy is the chemotherapy of getting rid of Laura from his life. Sometimes you need to scrape them off to live the life you want to live. There is an infinite blue ocean of opportunities waiting for you, and the only thing that is holding you back is the barnacles of toxicity, scrape them off.